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Life’s a beach, and then you… #IWSG

Posted on March 4, 2015March 3, 2015 by Loni Townsend

I love puns. There’s nothing better than a corny joke to send me into a fit of giggles. And when I’m giggling, I’m not fretting over my insecurities.

If you haven’t seen by now, I’ve got a book signing tomorrow. Eeek! Will I have enough books? Will I sell any? Will people like my swag? Plus The Ancient is coming out. And we had a meeting with The Seven, in which we discussed changing the release order of the novellas. Lust, my deadly sin, has been bumped from last to first. I need to get writing on that, but my mind won’t stop thinking about Isto. AHHHH!

Yeah, I’m kinda in freak-out mode.

Lucky for me, I’ve got Elizabeth Seckman on my blog today, sharing some of her funnies to distract me from all of this. I had the drums and symbols playing in my head, and I hope you do to.

And now, Elizabeth and her jokes:

Conner

What fish’s offer can’t you refuse? The Cod Fish

What’s the best day to go to the beach? Sunday

Where do fish go to borrow money? Loan Sharks

What happens when you throw a red rock in the black sea? It sinks

What does Cinderella wear in the ocean? Glass flippers

What fish plays the best music? The tune-a-fish

Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship? They were marooned

Why don’t oysters give money to charity? They’re shellfish

(Loni) AHAHAHAHAHA! That Marooned one was my favorite. How about you?

Defying ReasonJo Leigh Harper comes from a long line of trouble-making, white trash stock.
Tanner Coulter comes from a longer line of wealth-creating, blue blood stock.
Jo graduated college top of her class, moving toward a future full of possibilities.
Tanner dropped out of college, trading a law degree for drinking games and one night stands.

A family crisis throws the rich party boy and the poor genius girl together. The attraction is immediate, though neither one is a heart-in-the-sand-drawing believer in true love. But as the summer sun heats up along the shores of the Outer Banks, so does the connection between them. Maybe, just maybe, they can win at love by defying reason.

mom picElizabeth is a multi-published author of books for people who are believers in happily-ever- after, true love, and stories with a bit of fun and twists with their plots. The mother of four young men, she tackles laundry daily and is the keeper of the kitchen. She lives along the shores of the Ohio River in West Virginia, but dreams daily of the beach.

Facebook/ Blog/ Website/ Buy Link

About Insecure Writer’s Support Group
InsecureWritersSupportGroup
You can find the sign up for the IWSG here. We owe Alex J Cavanaugh a huge thank you for thinking this blog hop up.

Which joke was your favorite? Do you have any good jokes to share? When was the last time you visited a beach?

55 thoughts on “Life’s a beach, and then you… #IWSG”

  1. Sarah Foster says:
    March 4, 2015 at 4:55 AM

    Ha! The marooned one was my favorite, too. Sounds like you’ve got a lot going on, Loni! Just take a deep breath and focus on one thing at a time. And good luck with the book signing!

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:52 PM

      That was a good one!

      Reply
  2. Melissa Maygrove says:
    March 4, 2015 at 6:39 AM

    Pardon me. I’m still laughing about ‘marooned.’ πŸ˜›

    Congrats, Elizabeth. Great post.
    You and do it, Loni!!! πŸ˜€

    IWSG #142 until Alex culls the list again.

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:53 PM

      Twisted minds enjoy the same sort of humor πŸ˜‰

      Reply
  3. ChemistKen says:
    March 4, 2015 at 7:20 AM

    Hey, I thought the IWSG post was supposed to depress us, not cheer us up! Thanks for the laughs, Elizabeth.

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:54 PM

      Oh no, uplifting is always the goal.

      Reply
  4. L.G. Smith says:
    March 4, 2015 at 7:30 AM

    Oh, good luck with that book signing!

    Reply
  5. Michael Di Gesu says:
    March 4, 2015 at 7:47 AM

    Hi, Loni,

    All the best! You’ll do GREAT! Just keep breathing!

    Great funnies, Elizabeth…. Loved the oyster an shellfish… LOL

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:54 PM

      Well, I’d never call you shell fish Michael!

      Reply
  6. Chrys Fey says:
    March 4, 2015 at 8:10 AM

    The marooned one and loan shark one were my favorites. πŸ™‚

    Have fun at your book signing, Loni! And good luck with your short story!

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:56 PM

      Loan shark was my fave too.

      Reply
  7. Arlee Bird says:
    March 4, 2015 at 8:26 AM

    A book signing! How fun–hope it all goes well for you. My parents used to own an old Hudson about 1950 vintage that was maroon and I loved that car. I’ve always had a fondness for maroon the color as well as stories about being marooned.

    Arlee Bird
    A to Z Challenge Co-host
    Tossing It Out

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:57 PM

      It’s a pretty cool sounding word too.

      Reply
  8. M.J. Fifield says:
    March 4, 2015 at 8:46 AM

    Love the puns. The Marooned one was excellent.

    The last time I was on a beach was in December, but as soon as I move, I’ll be there almost daily. At least that’s the plan. We’ll see how it turns out.

    Best of luck with your signing tomorrow. You’ll do great!

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:58 PM

      Any time I can make it to the beach, I always like to get in as much in the sand time as I can get. My sisters call me boring, but hey, if I’m at the beach…why would I want to shop?

      Reply
  9. Pat Hatt says:
    March 4, 2015 at 9:08 AM

    haha so lame they are great. Have to go with the marooned one.

    What does a fish say when it hits a wall? Dam

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:59 PM

      LOL. I should have known you’d have a lame one to share too πŸ™‚

      Reply
  10. Julie Flanders says:
    March 4, 2015 at 9:31 AM

    Good luck with the signing!! You will totally rock it. And the marooned was my favorite too LOL.

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 2:59 PM

      You seem to be in good company!

      Reply
  11. Sarah Brentyn says:
    March 4, 2015 at 10:41 AM

    Best of luck at the book signing! Have fun. I love puns, too. My favorite was the marooned ships. Also, I’ve always like the shellfish joke. πŸ™‚

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 3:01 PM

      I hadn’t heard the shellfish one. I must not hang out in the right school of cool.

      Reply
  12. Lisa Buie-Collard says:
    March 4, 2015 at 10:53 AM

    Come on, Cod fish!!?? Ha ha! Glass flippers was a great visual! Like the tune-a-fish as well… Thanks for the jokes. Where on earth did you get them? Loni, good luck with the book signing!!!!

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 3:02 PM

      Googled stupid beach jokes for kids and picked my favorites.

      Reply
  13. Lori L. MacLaughlin says:
    March 4, 2015 at 11:21 AM

    Hee, hee. Loved the “marooned” and the “red rock in the black sea.”

    Good luck with your book signing! I don’t even want to think about going there yet. How do you know what to write when you sign?? Besides your name, of course. πŸ™‚

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 3:03 PM

      I got a good chuck out of the red rock…and an eye roll from my teen.

      Reply
  14. Caitlin says:
    March 4, 2015 at 11:32 AM

    I’m so excited for you, Loni! You deserve all this awesomeness coming your way!!

    Reply
  15. Madeline says:
    March 4, 2015 at 11:58 AM

    I’m with you on the “marooned” one – too funny! I also liked the “tune-a-fish” and “loan sharks.”

    Good luck with the book signing! You’ll do great!

    Reply
    1. Elizabeth Seckman says:
      March 4, 2015 at 3:03 PM

      Yep, so many good ones.

      Reply
  16. Gina Drayer says:
    March 4, 2015 at 2:18 PM

    Have fun stormin’ the castle at the book signing. You’ll do great!

    Reply
  17. M.R.R. says:
    March 4, 2015 at 2:46 PM

    Good luck. As for the puns, I’d go for either the “shellfish” or the “tune-a-fish” one.

    Reply
  18. Donna K. Weaver says:
    March 4, 2015 at 3:01 PM

    Heheh. Nice. Love Elizabeth. She rocks!

    Reply
  19. Elizabeth Seckman says:
    March 4, 2015 at 3:04 PM

    Or just say they are all spectacular. Hehe.

    Reply
  20. Elizabeth Seckman says:
    March 4, 2015 at 3:05 PM

    Thanks for having me over Loni!!!

    You are going to rock the book signing, I have zero doubts and 100% faith in you.

    And for the record, it looks like the maroon joke won…I suppose because it was the most colorful.

    Reply
  21. Alex J. Cavanaugh says:
    March 4, 2015 at 4:17 PM

    Glass flippers – oh, bad pun!!
    Loni, you will do fine at the signing. And no panic your story is first. You’ll get that done as well.

    Reply
  22. Stephen Tremp says:
    March 4, 2015 at 4:56 PM

    Thanks Elizabeth for the laughs! I’ll be going to the beach tomorrow and will look out for the loan sharks.

    Reply
  23. Carol Kilgore says:
    March 4, 2015 at 4:58 PM

    The tun-a fish. LOL!

    Have fun at your signing, Lori!

    Reply
  24. dolorah says:
    March 4, 2015 at 5:15 PM

    Loni it seems you have a lot to be insecure about. But I get the feeling that you are happiest when having lots to think about. Good luck with the signing party.

    Elizabeth: so much fun. I love simple jokes.

    Reply
  25. Kristin Smith says:
    March 4, 2015 at 6:05 PM

    Good luck with your book signing, Loni! I’m sure you have the perfect number of books and will sell them all! πŸ™‚

    Great jokes, Elizabeth! I think I’ll go against the crowd and say I like the tune-a-fish one the best. πŸ™‚

    Reply
  26. Liz Blocker (@lizblocker) says:
    March 4, 2015 at 6:56 PM

    Elizabeth, you are just too punny πŸ˜‰ And yes, the marooned one was my favorite, too!

    GOOD LUCK LONI! (silent cheer silent cheer) I will so be thinking of you. Have a great time!

    Reply
  27. Emma Adams says:
    March 4, 2015 at 7:48 PM

    Have fun at the signing! ^_^

    Reply
  28. Aldrea Alien says:
    March 4, 2015 at 7:55 PM

    I haven’t heard ‘The Cod Fish’ one before.

    Reply
  29. Shannon Lawrence says:
    March 4, 2015 at 11:33 PM

    Every time I see the word “maroon” I hear it in Bugs Bunny’s voice. You’ve got a lot coming up! Good luck getting everything done.

    Reply
  30. Medeia Sharif says:
    March 4, 2015 at 11:47 PM

    Great funnies from Elizabeth. Have a wonderful book signing today.

    Reply
  31. Jamie Ayres says:
    March 5, 2015 at 7:27 PM

    That Elizabeth sure is punny . . . I swear, I’ve been bookmarking every stop of her tour! Hilarious πŸ™‚

    Reply
  32. Mason T. Matchak says:
    March 5, 2015 at 9:02 PM

    In keeping with the theme, did you hear what the fish said when it ran into the wall?

    “DAM!”

    But seriously, hope everything went well at the book signing today. ^_^

    Reply
  33. Christine Rains says:
    March 6, 2015 at 5:29 PM

    Hehehe! Hilarious, Elizabeth! πŸ™‚ Thank you for the laugh. Good luck to you, Loni. Can’t wait to hear about the book signing.

    Reply
  34. Feather Stone says:
    March 7, 2015 at 4:28 PM

    Thanks for the humor. I’ll keep those in my back pocket. Blessings.

    Reply
  35. Milo James Fowler says:
    March 8, 2015 at 9:20 AM

    Oh yeah, nothing beats punny goodness. And good luck on the book signing! I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready for something like that. I prefer the idea of being a hermit in the woods (with WiFi).

    Reply
  36. Beth says:
    March 9, 2015 at 8:15 AM

    ha, i needed that laugh! and congrats on the book signing Loni! πŸ™‚

    Reply
  37. Caitlin says:
    March 9, 2015 at 11:15 AM

    How’d the book signing go?? And the swag?

    Reply
    1. Loni Townsend says:
      March 9, 2015 at 11:56 AM

      The signing went really well. People thought the temporary tattoos were creative, and I gave away about half of my pens. The swag was good. I’m going to do a write up about the event for Wednesday, but all in all, I call it a success!

      Reply
      1. Southpaw HR Sinclair says:
        March 9, 2015 at 2:12 PM

        The temporary tattoos would be fun!

        Reply
      2. Caitlin says:
        March 9, 2015 at 2:55 PM

        Awesome, girl. Totally awesome. See, you worked for it (writing the damn thing) and then with all the effort put into the promotion, this is what you get: success. Looking forward to reading all about it!

        Reply
  38. Southpaw HR Sinclair says:
    March 9, 2015 at 2:11 PM

    I like the selfish shellfish.

    Reply
  39. Lexa Cain says:
    March 9, 2015 at 5:54 PM

    Congrats to Elizabeth on her new book – it’s so romantic looking. πŸ™‚

    Good luck on writing that novella before the deadline – bet you’ll be soon writing “lustily.” lol

    Reply

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Welcome to my blog. I post here on Wednesdays most of the time, but you can find me on social media any day of the week. My topics include my stories and writing, life at the Town's End, creating and tinkering with graphics, things I learn and think might be helpful to others, and the occasional amateur photo. Thanks for stopping by! I hope to see you around.

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